The Most Common Ways Teachers Unknowingly Shame Struggling Readers

Elementary students are either learning to read or reading to learn. But what happens when you have students who struggle with both? Guest writer and Teaching Excellence Award Winner Keith Deltano of Rocking Reading shares his personal journey as a kid learning to read along with the common ways teachers unknowingly shame struggling readers. He also outlines practical solutions and tips to help students and teachers succeed with reading in the classroom.



*This post contains affiliate links to Amazon for your convenience. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases, which do not cost any extra for you. Please see the full disclosure here.*

Don’t Shame Struggling Readers

I couldn’t read and was retained in third grade.  I still couldn’t read after the second time through and I remember one overwhelming feeling: shame.

It was pervasive and continuous – it never went away, until somehow, in fourth grade, something clicked and I learned to read at grade level.

This feeling of shame hits you in your little elementary school gut: you can’t do something seemingly every one on the planet can do. 

You can’t read.

Everyone around you can.  You can’t. 

When I had to read out loud it was humiliating and physically painful.  It’s not just class work – reading is everywhere. 

You can’t read the board, the menu at a restaurant, street signs, the school lunch choices, the team names on the back of sports jerseys, baseball cards – while everyone around you can.

Remember this as you work with students. They are already carrying so much anxiety, so be mindful of the ways you may be adding shame to struggling readers.


The Opportunity for Embarrassment is Everywhere


I, and the millions of other “nonreaders” I now know were out there at the time, could never escape the inability to read – it popped up in the most unexpected places.

Summer did offer a reprieve but not full absolution. 

One of my most embarrassing reading induced collapses occurred the summer between my first and second attempt at third grade. 

My best friend, Ricky, was going on a week-long vacation and put me in charge of his afternoon paper route. (You can tell how old I am – this was when third graders could roam freely and deliver afternoon newspapers.) 

I was excited about the money I would make but more excited to take on the responsibility and show my best friend I could do it.  But I couldn’t.

Ricky had left me written instructions and his mom had helped him make them so they were accurate.  I couldn’t read them.  I couldn’t read the street signs or the special instructions on where to place the papers once I was at the house. 

Some customers wanted the paper at the side door, some at the front, or slipped under the garage door.  I couldn’t figure out any of it. 

That’s when panic set in and I began placing papers anywhere – my best guess.  A part of me knew that was wrong and started crying.  So, I rode my bike home several miles lugging all the papers in a shoulder sack and told my mother.

She threw me in the car and with her calling out instructions and me running from the car and back, we got the papers out. I went to school with the kids in the neighborhood that saw this. I heard about it the next day.


Specific Ways Educators Can Unknowingly Shame Struggling Readers


Not only can shame come from the general embarrassment of not being able to read, it can also come from unwitting educators themselves. 

I’m sure none of you yell at your students or berate those struggling with reading comprehension. 

But a sigh of exasperation can do a lot of damage, especially if you do it every time you have to help a student correct the same word over and over.  It’s frustrating, but an exasperated sigh is not helpful. 

We often think children do not pick up on these more subtle forms of communication.  We are wrong.  They can feel your exasperation so you must be careful not to broadcast it.

I had a teacher that sighed and muttered all the time.  She would plop down next to me with a long sigh – everyday.  She would mutter something like, β€œOk Keith, let’s try this again.”

Then she would laconically help me figure out why β€œphone” does not sound at all like it looks.  Sigh, plop,.. complaining mutter. 

Everyday. 

These gestures may seem small, but they are some of the most common ways teachers unknowingly shame struggling readers.

I’m grateful that my teacher helped me, but I would have appreciated it so much more if she hid her frustration.  It’s what all good teachers do.

I had another teacher that would yell across the class, β€œI’ll be there in a minute Keith.”  She had me long enough that she knew when I couldn’t read an assignment and would need help. She could have just walked over; I wasn’t going anywhere.

Here are things to do instead so that you don’t shame struggling readers:

  • Choose an upright posture and smile
  • Be sure that your tone of voice isn’t sharp or harsh
  • Compliment and praise students sincerely when they succeed
  • Make comments when you’re close to your student instead of yelling across the room
  • Use positive emojis on notes as encouragement and to build relationship
  • Spend time with students throughout the week talking about things not related to work or grades

Teachers must support students’ social-emotional needs in addition to helping them with reading. Even when learning online, relationship building is essential.

These are just a few of the ways you can help grow your students’ confidence with reading.

Tips for Improving Pull Out Programs


Many elementary schools use what’s called “pull out reading days” or “resource days” where students must leave the classroom to work one-on-one with a coach or reading specialist.

For me, as a kid, resource days were the worst!

I woke up in the morning knowing it was a β€œresource day.” 

Usually, three days a week–always the same. 

The resource teacher would come to the door, open it slightly and call out my name in that very loud whisper librarians often use. Great.  Then I would get up and walk to the door in front of all the β€œnormal” kids with my head down. 

Later, I would be returned mid class.  It was like I was being abducted by an alien. 

There are better ways to do all of this. Keep these suggestions in mind:

  • Resource could have been predictably scheduled to ease anxiety
  • I could have quietly gotten up with a nod from my teacher and walked out on my own.  I would still be leaving the class when nobody else was, but there would be no loud call out of my name. 
  • OR schools can consider scheduling the transition when we traveled from art, gym, or lunch. 
  • Students can be returned quietly as well to prevent disrupting class.

Pull out or resource reading days provide some amazing potential and help, but the goal is to not shame struggling readers!

Keeping the transition as smooth as possible with resource days makes a huge difference with that goal.

Small Accommodations Matter–Even If They Aren’t in Your Lesson Plans!


Through my elementary school journey, I had one absolutely wonderful teacher, Mrs Stoddard.  

I was never embarrassed in her class.  Even though I still struggled with reading, she did these things differently than other teachers:

  • Never called on me to read out loud
     
  • She knew when I wouldn’t be able to read an assignment and would magically appear next to my desk to quietly help me. 
  • We did mini phonics lesson to get me going. 
  • No plop in a chair pulled next to my desk and big sigh. 

I loved being in her class and actually loved it when she stopped by my desk. Surprisingly, I looked forward to the individual help she offered! 

In addition to these, she did something else that I remember to this day:  As I write this, I can actually see her and where I sat in the class. She looked very much like Amelia Earhart and I thought she was an angel!

Mrs. Stoddard would write reading passages, questions, and assignments on the chalkboard.  I couldn’t transpose what was on the board to my paper. Somehow, the distance from the board was too great.

This is usually a sign of dyslexia, dysgraphia, and visual processing disorder.  

Students see too much at one time:

  • sunlight coming through the window
  • sparkle of the chalk dust in the light
  • our classroom flag
  • the poster, and student birthday list on the board
  • plus whatever students are asked to read or write…

…all of it was too much for me.  I would look up, try to discern the sentence, look down, and write something that just didn’t match. 

But Mrs. Stoddard started conducting a magical trick – an unannounced agreement between the two of us.  

She copied all these lessons from laminated sheets I imagine she had accumulated over the years.  When she walked back to her desk, quietly, unobtrusively, without a word, she would slide the laminated lesson under my sheet of paper so that only the part I needed to write down was visible. 

This was done with the dexterity of a Cold War spy!

Now I could actually see what I was supposed to write down and answer. 

All the other visual distractions were gone.  The only thing I was looking at now was the assignment on my desk. 

And I could complete it with confidence. 

How Does This Help Struggling Readers?


Something even more magical happened while I was in Mrs. Stoddard’s class.

Toward the end of the year, the laminated lesson would appear on my desk sporadically and then not at all. 

As my confidence grew, so did my ability to read and write clearly.

I loved Mrs. Stoddard. I was never shamed in her class and felt safe in there.

When teachers include social-emotional support with effective reading instruction, it removes the shame for struggling readers!

This shame often stifles student academic growth.

The best way to help your struggling readers is to continue building relationship with them so that you learn little ways to encourage them; just like Mrs. Stoddard learned to do with me!


Consider the Perception of Your Interventions AND Your Own Mental Health


In conclusion, keep these things in mind when you work with struggling readers. 

Ask yourself these questions:

  • What are you saying with your body language, your tone, your words?
  • Are you making the way you help them as unobtrusive as possible? 
  • How are they pulled out if they are getting resource help outside the class?What social-emotional needs are you addressing?

I’m not asking you to lower your standards or put accommodations in place that will cripple students in the long run. 

It is also important to consider how your interventions are impacting your own mental health and self-care as an educator.

Struggling readers will need extra help and effort.  And so will you! Be sure to ask for help from your administrator and co-teachers.

As you examine ways you may be unknowningly shaming your struggling readers, you will develop systems that empower you and them to succeed!

They will love you for it!

If you’re looking for even more teaching tips on how to help struggling readers, check out this post:

keith-deltano making character education real through distance learning

Keith Deltano is a winner of the Teaching Excellence Award for his work with at risk youth as well as the National Impact Award for his efforts at parent outreach and education.  He has served and worked with children, teens, and families as a public school teacher, parent coach, and internationally touring educational comedian. Keith is currently working with students and families as a remedial reading consultant.  You can learn more about his work as an online reading tutor at www.RockingReading.com

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.